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The Hangover: The Best of Alan Garner


bigdog17k
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Alan Garner: Gambling? Who said anything about gambling? It's not gambling when you know you're gonna win. Counting cards is a foolproof system.

Stu Price: It's also illegal.

Alan Garner: It's not illegal, it's frowned upon, like... masturbating on an airplane.

Phil Wenneck: I'm pretty sure that's illegal too.

Alan Garner: Yeah, maybe after 9/11, where everybody got so sensitive. Thanks a lot, Bin Laden!

Doug Billings: Either way, you gotta be super smart to count cards, buddy, okay?

Alan Garner: Oh really?

Doug Billings: It's not easy.

Alan Garner: Okay, well maybe we should tell that to Rain Man, because he practically bankrupted a casino, and he was a ruh-tard.

Stu Price: A what?

Alan Garner: He was a ruh-tard.

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